5 Common Hesitations Stopping You From Doing a Boudoir Photoshoot (And Why They're Total Nonsense)

So, you’ve been toying with the idea of a boudoir photoshoot, haven't you? But every time you hype yourself up, those pesky fears creep in. “What if I don’t look good? What if I’m not sexy enough? What if I accidentally pose like a confused flamingo?”

Fear not, fabulous human, because I’m here to guide you through the five most common fears & hesitations about boudoir photography—and absolutely annihilate them. By the end of this post, you’ll be ready to strut into that session like you own the damn planet. Let’s dive in, shall we?

Fear #1: “I Don’t Have the ‘Right’ Body.”

Ah, yes, the classic “My body isn’t good enough” narrative, brought to you by society’s unrealistic beauty standards and your high school gym coach. Let me tell you a secret: There is no such thing as a "right" body. Bodies are like pizza—they come in all shapes, sizes, and flavors, and every single one is fabulous.

Stretch marks? Scars? Wrinkles? They’re not flaws, darling. They’re your story. And that story deserves to be celebrated. Boudoir photography isn’t about squeezing into someone else's idea of perfection—it’s about stepping into your own authenticity and saying, “Damn, I look good.”

Oh, and let’s clear this up right now: You do NOT need to lose weight for a boudoir shoot. In fact, we actively discourage it. Why? Because we want the photos to reflect you—the amazing, beautiful, badass YOU. Not some temporary version of yourself that’ll make you look back and think, “Who even is this person?”

Through The Lens owner, Jos, at her own boudoir photoshoot with Risq' Boudoir in September 2024. Photo Credit: Risq' Boudoir

Fear #2: “I’m Not a ‘Sexy’ Person.”

Girl, who told you that? (Seriously, give me their number—I’d like to have a word.)

Here’s the thing: We’ve been conditioned to think being “sexy” means having a certain look or pleasing someone else (usually for the male gaze—ugh). But being sexy has nothing to do with how you look and everything to do with how you feel.

Sexy is an energy. It’s confidence. It’s that little smirk you do when you know you’ve got this. Sexy can be wearing lacy lingerie, or it can be rocking sweatpants and eating chips straight out of the bag. (Both are valid. Both are iconic.)

The beauty of boudoir is that it allows you to define your own version of sexy—and trust me, you’ve got it in you! Tap into it, own it, and let it shine.

Fear #3: “I Don’t Know How to Pose.”

Wait… you’re telling me you’ve never professionally posed half-naked while being photographed before? How dare you! (Kidding, of course.)

Newsflash: No one knows how to pose. That’s why you hire a professional photographer. A good boudoir photographer will guide you through the entire session, making sure everything—from your posture to your “smize” (thanks, Tyra Banks)—looks incredible. You don’t need to have any modeling experience. Zero. Zilch. Nada.

Fun fact: Most boudoir clients are first-timers. And guess what? They walk out feeling like Beyoncé with a side of Rihanna. You will, too.

Fear #4: “I Won’t Feel Like Myself.”

Let’s address the elephant in the room: boudoir photography often conjures up images of lace, lingerie, and elaborate high heels. But here’s the plot twist: You don’t have to wear any of that if it’s not your vibe.

What makes you feel confident? Is it an oversized sweater? Cosplay? A pair of jeans and a crop top? Heck, it can even be nothing but your favorite blanket! The goal is to capture you—not some cliché version of “sexy” that doesn’t feel authentic.

Think about that outfit you’ve always wanted to wear but haven’t mustered the courage to rock yet. Bring it. Own it. Add a boudoir twist, and voilà—you’ve unlocked a version of yourself you didn’t even know existed.

Fear #5: “Where Will Those Photos End Up?”

Alright, this one is legit—because no one wants to wake up and find their boudoir photos accidentally starring in a meme. Let me ease your mind: You have full control over what happens to your photos.

A professional photographer will always respect your privacy. Through The Lens offers private, password-protected galleries for you to view your images and only the photographer, editor & professional photo lab sees them without your written consent. (Pro tip: If a photographer doesn’t prioritize your privacy or refuses to put this in writing, run—that’s a red flag.)

Whether you want to keep the photos just for yourself, share them with a partner, or frame them and hang them in your living room (power move), the choice is entirely yours.

The Bottom Line: Boudoir is For Everyone

Listen, doing a boudoir photoshoot is like joining the Cool Kids Confidence Club. It’s empowering. It’s transformative. And it’s about so much more than pretty pictures—it’s about reminding yourself of the absolute queen (or king, or royal being) you are.

So, what’s stopping you now? Take the leap, challenge your fears, and treat yourself to an experience that will leave you feeling like the masterpiece you already are.

If you’re ready to start your boudoir journey or just want to chat about it, check out our link here. We’d love to help you step into your power—you deserve it.

Now, go forth and slay, you glorious human. You’ve got this. 💃✨